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 Never Ending Story ....

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BMG



Number of posts : 2571

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Tue Mar 10, 2009 9:53 am

KK wrote:
BMG wrote:
jamesjchrist wrote:
KK wrote:
Joebert wrote:
java wrote:
... that he was complete butt naked under his clothes. The vice squad called the pussy posse and he was promptly and decently arrested for indecent exposure. He hired Alan Dershowitz for his attorney and...

...and promtly lost. While in prison his first day he meet...
charlie manson, who convinced him he knew a better way. so alvin tattoed a swastika on his forehead and together they plotted to



....eat for free at the dairy queen when they busted out of jail, but when they got there the ice cream had melted due to a helter swelter, so alvin, feeling a little hydrophobic and eying his psychotic friend hungrily, decided to............

...........kill Charlie and sell his body on Ebay to get money for travel and some good drugs. He sold the rapidly decomposing corpse to a Jamaican voodoo posse for $10,000.00 and a pound of killer ganja. He hopped a plane for Bora Bora to relax on the beach and get stoned for a while while things cooled off in the states. When he sat down on the plane he couldnt believe his eyes, he was sitting next to.........
DB Cooper. So he new right from the start this flight was going nowhere good. Once airborne he searched for a parachute but all he found was.......

........a pillow case, but since he is very small it worked. Just as DB ordered the plane door opened Alvin grabbed his pillow case and DB's satchel full of money and dived off the plane. He floated gently toward earth but DB free fell right past him, grabbing the money and opening his chute several hunderd feet lower. Alvin, being much lighter, drifted a long way before landing right in the middle of........
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Tue Mar 10, 2009 11:16 am

........a pillow case, but since he is very small it worked. Just as DB ordered the plane door opened Alvin grabbed his pillow case and DB's satchel full of money and dived off the plane. He floated gently toward earth but DB free fell right past him, grabbing the money and opening his chute several hunderd feet lower. Alvin, being much lighter, drifted a long way before landing right in the middle of........[/quote] a boyscout jamboree. where he spent the night eating smores, erning merit badges and .......
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BMG

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Location : Dont know......I'm lost
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Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Tue Mar 10, 2009 1:10 pm

KK wrote:
........a pillow case, but since he is very small it worked. Just as DB ordered the plane door opened Alvin grabbed his pillow case and DB's satchel full of money and dived off the plane. He floated gently toward earth but DB free fell right past him, grabbing the money and opening his chute several hunderd feet lower. Alvin, being much lighter, drifted a long way before landing right in the middle of........
a boyscout jamboree. where he spent the night eating smores, erning merit badges and .......[/quote]

.........having homosexual encounters with scout masters. In the morning he was feeling so dirty and ashamed that he jumped off the Tallahatchee Bridge, but not before saying goodbye to his best friend, Pee Wee Herman. Pee Wee was sad to hear that Alvin was going to commit suicide but understood because he had considered it many times himself. After Alvin left, Pee Weee jumped on his bike and headed for ...........
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Tue Mar 10, 2009 7:29 pm

BMG wrote:
KK wrote:
........a pillow case, but since he is very small it worked. Just as DB ordered the plane door opened Alvin grabbed his pillow case and DB's satchel full of money and dived off the plane. He floated gently toward earth but DB free fell right past him, grabbing the money and opening his chute several hunderd feet lower. Alvin, being much lighter, drifted a long way before landing right in the middle of........
a boyscout jamboree. where he spent the night eating smores, erning merit badges and .......

.........having homosexual encounters with scout masters. In the morning he was feeling so dirty and ashamed that he jumped off the Tallahatchee Bridge, but not before saying goodbye to his best friend, Pee Wee Herman. Pee Wee was sad to hear that Alvin was going to commit suicide but understood because he had considered it many times himself. After Alvin left, Pee Weee jumped on his bike and headed for ...........[/quote] Sturgis, He never mised bike week. Simon or theodre would just have to step up to the plate to help alvin. Simon called the suicide hotline only to find it was disconected. funding had been redirected to a democratic pork project. he called his congressman and was told.......
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BMG

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Location : Dont know......I'm lost
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pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Wed Mar 11, 2009 1:12 pm

KK wrote:
BMG wrote:
KK wrote:
........a pillow case, but since he is very small it worked. Just as DB ordered the plane door opened Alvin grabbed his pillow case and DB's satchel full of money and dived off the plane. He floated gently toward earth but DB free fell right past him, grabbing the money and opening his chute several hunderd feet lower. Alvin, being much lighter, drifted a long way before landing right in the middle of........
a boyscout jamboree. where he spent the night eating smores, erning merit badges and .......

.........having homosexual encounters with scout masters. In the morning he was feeling so dirty and ashamed that he jumped off the Tallahatchee Bridge, but not before saying goodbye to his best friend, Pee Wee Herman. Pee Wee was sad to hear that Alvin was going to commit suicide but understood because he had considered it many times himself. After Alvin left, Pee Weee jumped on his bike and headed for ...........
Sturgis, He never mised bike week. Simon or theodre would just have to step up to the plate to help alvin. Simon called the suicide hotline only to find it was disconected. funding had been redirected to a democratic pork project. he called his congressman and was told.......[/quote]

.........that for a modest campaign contribution of $10,000.00 the congressman would look into the matter and see what he could do. Simon didnt have that kind of money so he decided to rob a local drug dealer to get it. He knew he would need some help so he called........
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Wed Mar 11, 2009 8:23 pm

.........that for a modest campaign contribution of $10,000.00 the congressman would look into the matter and see what he could do. Simon didnt have that kind of money so he decided to rob a local drug dealer to get it. He knew he would need some help so he called........[/quote] Marion Barry, who knew the local drug dealer on a personal basis. they struck a deal, Alvin would get the cash and marion would get what ever drugs er uhm residuals were left over. But after they made the hit Alvin found the congressman to be in a very foul mood. you see the drug dealer was also his supplier. so when alvin showed up with the $10,000 cash he said .....
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BMG

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Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Thu Mar 12, 2009 12:53 pm

KK wrote:
.........that for a modest campaign contribution of $10,000.00 the congressman would look into the matter and see what he could do. Simon didnt have that kind of money so he decided to rob a local drug dealer to get it. He knew he would need some help so he called........
Marion Barry, who knew the local drug dealer on a personal basis. they struck a deal, Alvin would get the cash and marion would get what ever drugs er uhm residuals were left over. But after they made the hit Alvin found the congressman to be in a very foul mood. you see the drug dealer was also his supplier. so when alvin showed up with the $10,000 cash he said .....[/quote]

....... the deal was off. The congressman happened to be Barney Frank. After the meeting Barney went down to his favorite gay bar to see what he could find for the evening. He danced with several guys, had several drinks, and finally hooked up with a guy named Bruce, who was from Australia. On their way to Barney's house they stopped off at Ace Hardware and picked up ........
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KK

avatar

Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Thu Mar 12, 2009 7:21 pm

....... the deal was off. The congressman happened to be Barney Frank. After the meeting Barney went down to his favorite gay bar to see what he could find for the evening. He danced with several guys, had several drinks, and finally hooked up with a guy named Bruce, who was from Australia. On their way to Barney's house they stopped off at Ace Hardware and picked up ........[/quote] some gear lube and a plunger. Bruce was overheard saying " i'm going to stimulate more than your economy" Barney started to bark like a dog which made a chinaman thing about lunch and a cat .....
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BMG

avatar

Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Fri Mar 13, 2009 9:14 am

KK wrote:
....... the deal was off. The congressman happened to be Barney Frank. After the meeting Barney went down to his favorite gay bar to see what he could find for the evening. He danced with several guys, had several drinks, and finally hooked up with a guy named Bruce, who was from Australia. On their way to Barney's house they stopped off at Ace Hardware and picked up ........
some gear lube and a plunger. Bruce was overheard saying " i'm going to stimulate more than your economy" Barney started to bark like a dog which made a chinaman thing about lunch and a cat .....[/quote]

......so the chinaman went after the cat and Bruce whacked him on the head with the plunger handle, knocking him out cold. Barney, remembering what fun Jeffrey Dahmer had with captured asians had Bruce help him load the chinaman in his trunk and they took him to Barney's basement and tied him to an old bed frame. When he woke up the first thing he saw was Barney standing there, naked except for a........
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Fri Mar 13, 2009 9:29 am

......so the chinaman went after the cat and Bruce whacked him on the head with the plunger handle, knocking him out cold. Barney, remembering what fun Jeffrey Dahmer had with captured asians had Bruce help him load the chinaman in his trunk and they took him to Barney's basement and tied him to an old bed frame. When he woke up the first thing he saw was Barney standing there, naked except for a........[/quote] a pair of pasties, stockings and a garter. fear really began to set in when barney turned around bent over and picked up a .......
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BMG

avatar

Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Fri Mar 13, 2009 11:22 am

KK wrote:
......so the chinaman went after the cat and Bruce whacked him on the head with the plunger handle, knocking him out cold. Barney, remembering what fun Jeffrey Dahmer had with captured asians had Bruce help him load the chinaman in his trunk and they took him to Barney's basement and tied him to an old bed frame. When he woke up the first thing he saw was Barney standing there, naked except for a........
a pair of pasties, stockings and a garter. fear really began to set in when barney turned around bent over and picked up a .......[/quote]

........cattle prod. Things were looking pretty bad for the chinaman as Barney approached, zapping the prod and laughing. Just then the door flew open and Bruce Lee ran into the room wielding a set of nunchucks and looking ready to kick some ass. Bruce knocked out the Australian and came for Barney, screaming wildly. Barney fainted and fell to the floor, knocking himself out.
Bruce released his cousin from the bed frame and they..........
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java

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PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Fri Mar 13, 2009 11:31 am

BMG wrote:


........cattle prod. Things were looking pretty bad for the chinaman as Barney approached, zapping the prod and laughing. Just then the door flew open and Bruce Lee ran into the room wielding a set of nunchucks and looking ready to kick some ass. Bruce knocked out the Australian and came for Barney, screaming wildly. Barney fainted and fell to the floor, knocking himself out.
Bruce released his cousin from the bed frame and they..........

headed for the house of mirrors but before they could get there they were distracted by an offer of $500,000 for anybody who could ring the bell without using a mallet. Bruce scrunched up his face like a cat and delivered his best high-velocity one-inch punch to the bell-ringing contraption, and...
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KK

avatar

Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Sat Mar 14, 2009 8:38 pm

headed for the house of mirrors but before they could get there they were distracted by an offer of $500,000 for anybody who could ring the bell without using a mallet. Bruce scrunched up his face like a cat and delivered his best high-velocity one-inch punch to the bell-ringing contraption, and...[/quote] missed and hit himself in the foot. he screamed that hurt worse than obama winning the election. he screamed so load they could hear him all the way in .....
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Giada

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Location : Happy Hour
Humor : Good
Number of posts : 2011
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Rep : 154

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Sat Mar 14, 2009 8:45 pm

KK wrote:
headed for the house of mirrors but before they could get there they were distracted by an offer of $500,000 for anybody who could ring the bell without using a mallet. Bruce scrunched up his face like a cat and delivered his best high-velocity one-inch punch to the bell-ringing contraption, and...
missed and hit himself in the foot. he screamed that hurt worse than obama winning the election. he screamed so load they could hear him all the way in .....[/quote]


Oz which, btw, is where Anastasia and Amelia and the Green Guy (remember them?) heard the cries. The Lollipop Kids went out into the fields to see what the commotion was about, but realizing it was all political crap, came back, at which time Anastasia and Amelia and Green Guy decided to pack up and leave for Memphis, where they hoped to find Elvis at Graceland. Just as their balloon ascended into the air, a great northern wind blew and...
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Sat Mar 14, 2009 8:52 pm

Giada wrote:
KK wrote:
headed for the house of mirrors but before they could get there they were distracted by an offer of $500,000 for anybody who could ring the bell without using a mallet. Bruce scrunched up his face like a cat and delivered his best high-velocity one-inch punch to the bell-ringing contraption, and...
missed and hit himself in the foot. he screamed that hurt worse than obama winning the election. he screamed so load they could hear him all the way in .....


Oz which, btw, is where Anastasia and Amelia and the Green Guy (remember them?) heard the cries. The Lollipop Kids went out into the fields to see what the commotion was about, but realizing it was all political crap, came back, at which time Anastasia and Amelia and Green Guy decided to pack up and leave for Memphis, where they hoped to find Elvis at Graceland. Just as their balloon ascended into the air, a great northern wind blew and...[/quote] shuffled them off to buffalo. but just shy of buffalo they ran out of propane and landed in a ......
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Giada

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Location : Happy Hour
Humor : Good
Number of posts : 2011
pennies : 2069
Rep : 154

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Sat Mar 14, 2009 8:55 pm

KK wrote:
Giada wrote:
KK wrote:
headed for the house of mirrors but before they could get there they were distracted by an offer of $500,000 for anybody who could ring the bell without using a mallet. Bruce scrunched up his face like a cat and delivered his best high-velocity one-inch punch to the bell-ringing contraption, and...
missed and hit himself in the foot. he screamed that hurt worse than obama winning the election. he screamed so load they could hear him all the way in .....


Oz which, btw, is where Anastasia and Amelia and the Green Guy (remember them?) heard the cries. The Lollipop Kids went out into the fields to see what the commotion was about, but realizing it was all political crap, came back, at which time Anastasia and Amelia and Green Guy decided to pack up and leave for Memphis, where they hoped to find Elvis at Graceland. Just as their balloon ascended into the air, a great northern wind blew and...
shuffled them off to buffalo. but just shy of buffalo they ran out of propane and landed in a ......[/quote]


redneck,backwoods, low-life, white-trash bar and grill where a drunken young tramp named Amy came up to Anastasia and said...
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Sun Mar 15, 2009 10:59 pm

redneck,backwoods, low-life, white-trash bar and grill where a drunken young tramp named Amy came up to Anastasia and said...[/quote]


got any oxycondon? Ican haz them you know. right away they knew they didn't like her so they made there way out the door and stopped at the local fillin station to ask for ......
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BMG

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Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Mon Mar 16, 2009 9:46 am

KK wrote:
redneck,backwoods, low-life, white-trash bar and grill where a drunken young tramp named Amy came up to Anastasia and said...


got any oxycondon? Ican haz them you know. right away they knew they didn't like her so they made there way out the door and stopped at the local fillin station to ask for ......[/quote]


........directions to the local novelty shop, where they picked up what they needed to disguise themselves as........
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Mon Mar 16, 2009 12:20 pm

........directions to the local novelty shop, where they picked up what they needed to disguise themselves as........[/quote] gypsies, tramps and theives. their plan was to infiltrate congress and they wanted to go undetected. they hoped on amtrack and while in the dining car they discussed.....
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BMG

avatar

Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Tue Mar 17, 2009 9:41 am

KK wrote:
........directions to the local novelty shop, where they picked up what they needed to disguise themselves as........
gypsies, tramps and theives. their plan was to infiltrate congress and they wanted to go undetected. they hoped on amtrack and while in the dining car they discussed.....[/quote]

.......Obama's bailout scheme. They looked around and there at another table sat Al Franken and Bill O'Reilly having dinner together. All of a sudden a midget walked up to the table where Franken and O'Reilly were seated. The midget grabbed Franken's drink, threw it on him, and shouted.....
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Tue Mar 17, 2009 7:58 pm

BMG wrote:
KK wrote:
........directions to the local novelty shop, where they picked up what they needed to disguise themselves as........
gypsies, tramps and theives. their plan was to infiltrate congress and they wanted to go undetected. they hoped on amtrack and while in the dining car they discussed.....

.......Obama's bailout scheme. They looked around and there at another table sat Al Franken and Bill O'Reilly having dinner together. All of a sudden a midget walked up to the table where Franken and O'Reilly were seated. The midget grabbed Franken's drink, threw it on him, and shouted.....[/quote] you slanderous bastard. you should be sued for the title of your book Rush Limbaugh Is a Big Fat Idiot. (can you imagine if someone wrote a book Obama is a black dumbass shocked ) Minnesota's budget could have been balanced with the money wasted on your stupid recounts. It's time you hit the road and .......
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BMG

avatar

Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Wed Mar 18, 2009 9:15 am

KK wrote:
BMG wrote:
KK wrote:
........directions to the local novelty shop, where they picked up what they needed to disguise themselves as........
gypsies, tramps and theives. their plan was to infiltrate congress and they wanted to go undetected. they hoped on amtrack and while in the dining car they discussed.....

.......Obama's bailout scheme. They looked around and there at another table sat Al Franken and Bill O'Reilly having dinner together. All of a sudden a midget walked up to the table where Franken and O'Reilly were seated. The midget grabbed Franken's drink, threw it on him, and shouted.....
you slanderous bastard. you should be sued for the title of your book Rush Limbaugh Is a Big Fat Idiot. (can you imagine if someone wrote a book Obama is a black dumbass shocked ) Minnesota's budget could have been balanced with the money wasted on your stupid recounts. It's time you hit the road and .......[/quote]

......joined the circus because you could be a clown and save money on makeup because you dont need any to look like a clown. Franken was so shocked he started choking on his pork chop. He motioned that he was choking so someone would perform the heimlich maneuver on him but everyone just sat there and watched. Finally O'Reilly stuffed a napkin in Franken's mouth, got up, and asked the midget if he could buy him a drink. They went to the bar and ordered drinks. O'Reilly told the midget he had an opening on his staff and asked him if he would like to hire on as a........
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KK

avatar

Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Wed Mar 18, 2009 8:19 pm

......joined the circus because you could be a clown and save money on makeup because you dont need any to look like a clown. Franken was so shocked he started choking on his pork chop. He motioned that he was choking so someone would perform the heimlich maneuver on him but everyone just sat there and watched. Finally O'Reilly stuffed a napkin in Franken's mouth, got up, and asked the midget if he could buy him a drink. They went to the bar and ordered drinks. O'Reilly told the midget he had an opening on his staff and asked him if he would like to hire on as a........[/quote]
freedom fighter. it's time we take back the world from those who would doom us. with that al franken gave a final choke and blew out an eyeball. so bill and the midget shoke hands and .....
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BMG

avatar

Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Thu Mar 19, 2009 10:12 am

KK wrote:
......joined the circus because you could be a clown and save money on makeup because you dont need any to look like a clown. Franken was so shocked he started choking on his pork chop. He motioned that he was choking so someone would perform the heimlich maneuver on him but everyone just sat there and watched. Finally O'Reilly stuffed a napkin in Franken's mouth, got up, and asked the midget if he could buy him a drink. They went to the bar and ordered drinks. O'Reilly told the midget he had an opening on his staff and asked him if he would like to hire on as a........

freedom fighter. it's time we take back the world from those who would doom us. with that al franken gave a final choke and blew out an eyeball. so bill and the midget shoke hands and .....[/quote]

........head down to the Fox studio for a brainstorming session. Later that evening they hit on a fantastic idea for a new news talk show. Its a show hosted by the midget, who is openly gay. They decide to call the show The Fudge Packer Factor. For the debut of the show they have a special guest, it is........
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KK

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Location : New York
Super Powers : poastwhore Number of posts : 8316
pennies : 7853
Rep : 354

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Thu Mar 19, 2009 9:41 pm

BMG wrote:
KK wrote:
......joined the circus because you could be a clown and save money on makeup because you dont need any to look like a clown. Franken was so shocked he started choking on his pork chop. He motioned that he was choking so someone would perform the heimlich maneuver on him but everyone just sat there and watched. Finally O'Reilly stuffed a napkin in Franken's mouth, got up, and asked the midget if he could buy him a drink. They went to the bar and ordered drinks. O'Reilly told the midget he had an opening on his staff and asked him if he would like to hire on as a........

freedom fighter. it's time we take back the world from those who would doom us. with that al franken gave a final choke and blew out an eyeball. so bill and the midget shoke hands and .....

........head down to the Fox studio for a brainstorming session. Later that evening they hit on a fantastic idea for a new news talk show. Its a show hosted by the midget, who is openly gay. They decide to call the show The Fudge Packer Factor. For the debut of the show they have a special guest, it is........[/quote] richard simmons who while sweatin to the oldies revealed that ......
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BMG

avatar

Location : Dont know......I'm lost
Humor : Twisted
Number of posts : 2571
pennies : 2320
Rep : 79

PostSubject: Re: Never Ending Story ....   Fri Mar 20, 2009 10:15 am

KK wrote:
BMG wrote:
KK wrote:
......joined the circus because you could be a clown and save money on makeup because you dont need any to look like a clown. Franken was so shocked he started choking on his pork chop. He motioned that he was choking so someone would perform the heimlich maneuver on him but everyone just sat there and watched. Finally O'Reilly stuffed a napkin in Franken's mouth, got up, and asked the midget if he could buy him a drink. They went to the bar and ordered drinks. O'Reilly told the midget he had an opening on his staff and asked him if he would like to hire on as a........

freedom fighter. it's time we take back the world from those who would doom us. with that al franken gave a final choke and blew out an eyeball. so bill and the midget shoke hands and .....

........head down to the Fox studio for a brainstorming session. Later that evening they hit on a fantastic idea for a new news talk show. Its a show hosted by the midget, who is openly gay. They decide to call the show The Fudge Packer Factor. For the debut of the show they have a special guest, it is........
richard simmons who while sweatin to the oldies revealed that ......[/quote]

......... he had once had a botched sex change operation. He revealed that he sought the operation while under mental stress after years of sexual abuse at the hands of..........
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